I don't know what kind of calendar to get for my desk for next year. My mom got me a cool "Little Zen Calendar" last year and I like peeling off the sheets everyday, and I like that the date is in a large font so that I don't have to turn around and squint at the free wall calendar i got from our publisher, but then the date is also written on a checkerboard type area, or rather it's done up like graph paper, so now i've got about twenty or so sheets with everyother square filled in like a checkerboard scattered over my desk. My desk is already cluttered enough as it is. Let's have a virtual tour, shall we? Starting at the left, near the entrance of my cubicle (the desk is L-shaped)

First we've got a manual to the Dues and Basic Subscriptions module of our lovely relational database. That's on a stack of papers that most likely has no importance. Behind that is one of those "In/Out" trays flowing over with papers, magazines (our org. publishes one quarterly) memos, newspaper clippings i will one day tack up on the wall and about fifteen thousand more useless sheets of paper that were given to me by people who had no idea what i do (even though they work here, too) but thought they would help me immensely. Moving to the right is another stack of papers that once had a purpose, but now just take up space. Copies of batches, a manila envelope containing a gift for a friend (and i'll mail it to 'im one day, i swear!) and an overfilled binder containing a lot of documentation on the switch from non-relational to relational database. next to that, and partially holdin up the stack is my tape dispenser. I've never actually used my tape dispenser. But it looks nice on the desk, when you can see it. Next to that is a small notepad and a bottle of Nu-Skin. In front of those is a stack of entered-in and unentered-in surveys. Behind that is my phone. Next to that is a staple puller, an ink pad and date stamper, a folded up paper towel, four paperclips, a nailfile and some white out. Keep moving! There's my paperstand thing? I don't know what the heck it's called. It's a stand that holds papers upright. It's surprisingly got only one page on it, and the page is semi-relevant to what i'm doing today. Which is rather uncommon. Behind that is a bunch of, you guessed it, papers! Next to that is a mug with a straw in it. Why? I don't know. Then is my binderclip bracelet, a speaker, my monitor on the stand that's got a lovely work-art display of varying sized binder clips. They're such fun. It's like a zen garden, only... not. Next to my monitor is another speaker, my go-cup, a nearly empty package of pumpkin seeds, a teensy glass bottle of Heinz� ketchup, a bag of promo-stuff from the ...Trail of Dead/Queens of the Stone Age show, my calendar, a bottle of generic tums, a cool little tin from some lemon flavoured candies, a plastic bowl containing cheez-it crumbs, a box of peach tea, a pad of post-its, a paper box full of paperclips (ooh, fawncy), a little desk cubey thing, for pens and things, a half eaten bowl of udon soup, a tub of udder cream (cos it works, ok?!) then a stack of papers (i swear they procreate when i'm not here) a couple of empty tupperware bowls, a teeshirt from when i tried to give blood, a free sample packet of febreeze (fa shizzle, yo) my purse, a newspaper, a couple of magazines, a sweater, a cardboard box from the corner bakery holding my cd's (cos it's the perfect size for that, which is cool), and an empty plastic shopping bag from the drugstore. Yeh, it's a bit messy.

Don't even get me started on the shelves and drawers. Or under the desk, even. I'm afraid to even look.